Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Dads Maluyo
It was months ago when I turned 25. Just as I thought my life seems to be perfectly fine — I have a job that I really like and a job that is in line with my degree — until one day, as I open my social media account, I saw some of my classmates in college achieving more things than I am right now. Immediately I felt anxious about my current life and asked myself questions such as, “are you really getting the things that you want in life? Are you doing it right? Why does everyone seem to have a pretty normal life, but you are not? Why is everything moving fast, and you are not?”
It was there I realized that I might be experiencing a quarter-life crisis. It is funny because I am a jolly person, full of enthusiasm and optimism. So, I thought, “Hey! I’ll be spared from the quarter-life crisis experience”, well co-fresh approachers, I’m wrong.
So just like any normal millennial does, I went to google and tried to understand what is “Quarter Life Crisis” all about. Upon researching, I stumbled on this blog published by Bradley University and says that “The quarter-life crisis is a period of uncertainty and questioning that typically occurs when people feel trapped, uninspired and disillusioned during their mid-20s to early 30s”.
In other words, this is a phase where a person is having an intense soul searching and start questioning many things that he/she have. According to Muse’s article, Powering through Quarter-Life Crisis, “people who are experiencing quarter-life crises may be underemployed, unemployed, or a person that has the right job but was struggling to express their creativity.”
But is it normal for us to feel it? Are you alone? The answer is “Yes” it’s normal for you to explore this and “No” you are not alone, according to the article published by forbes.com, “This Is What Your Quarter-Life Crisis Is Telling You” is that 86% percent of millennials were affected by this event in life because of some factors such as, Disappointment, Insecurities, and Depression.
What should we do to survive this? As a “millennial” who is currently experiencing Quarter-life Crisis, I always remind myself of a quote that I heard once when I attended a college seminar. The speaker of that seminar told us that “always remember, you are the master of your fate.” Everything that you are experiencing right now is only part of the greater future ahead of you.
To further educate me on what is going on and how to survive the process, I asked some of my established workmates (whom I think went through Quarter-Life crisis), this is what they shared.
– Never compare yourself to others, and always trust the process. Remember that each individual has a unique timeline in life. You may be experiencing pain in the night, but soon the sky will smile upon you and give your heart’s desire.
– Don’t be afraid to seek professional help. As mentioned above, one of the causes of this crisis is depression, we know how serious depression can be to an individual. You feel like giving up there are institutions around the world that will help you understand your current situation. (Let’s all break the stigma of mental illness folks, It is a sickness that needs to be cured.)
– Try new things. If you feel that you are stagnant in your workplace, try to find time to do something that you don’t know yet. Things that will express your creative side and will allow you to show who you really are. For example, learning how to paint, learn how to a musical instrument, or writing a journal of your daily life. Diverting your energy to something productive — and things that will make you happy — will most likely result in a more comfortable version of you. This ongoing CoVID19 Pandemic forced most of us to do things that are new to pretty new to us, as much as possible, make use of this time to learn more about a lot of things.
– No matter how busy you are, always find time to bond with your friends and family. A trusted support system is a big help while you are in this crisis. It will also help you get through tough things in life (as much as possible avoid toxic friends) a supportive group of friends with the same goals in life will remind you that everything is normal that you are on the right track. “Never be shy to ask for help,” my colleague pointed that out to me. Your friends and family are always there right by your side all throughout the process, You just have to ask them for help.
– Pause, Breathe, and Re-evaluate. If all of the mentioned steps are not working, you might wanna have to pause for a while and take a break and rethink what you really want in life because if you push yourself to your limits, you’re going to find yourself on the verge of everything. A famous reporter in the Philippines once said that “when it’s no longer fulfilling, even if you’re comfortable with what you do, don’t hesitate. Walk away.” Nothing is more important than your self-care; when you are not growing anymore, maybe it’s really time for you to let go and move onto a new career in life.
Should you be worried about Quarter Life Crisis? To sum up, the research that I made and all the questions that I asked from some people, Quarter Life crisis isn’t something that we should be worried about, yes it’s not a pleasant experience, but it is part of “Adulting” process. One of my former colleagues told me that the Quarter-life Crisis is a stage where you will realize that life isn’t a walk in the park, you will experience struggles from time to time. Sometimes you’ll stumble, but it does not matter how you stumble, the important thing is how you get up.
We also have to remember that this phase is just preparing us for greater things ahead. So cheer up, chin up, and fight the good fight. Never ever lose hope, and never doubt yourself.
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